“Did I Say I Hate Fish?”
Father Peter Fitzgibbons
February 18 – 19, 2023
Gospel: Matthew 5:38-48
On Wednesday, we begin the season of Lent. Ash Wednesday is not a holy day of obligation. It’s a “good to do” and not a “must do.” Ashes will be given only at 8:30 am and 6:30 pm. There will be no “drive-thru” ashes or “ashes to go” given. Also, you cannot drive into the parking lot, beep the horn, and expect to receive ashes. There are some places that actually do that. It’s a Sacramental just like Holy Water and not mandatory. We’d love for you to come to Mass to begin the season of Lent. On Ash Wednesday and Good Friday there is a “black fast” for those younger than 59 (I’m 69) which means you cannot eat between meals, and you can have only one full meal for the day considering your medical circumstances of course. Nobody can eat meat on Ash Wednesday and on Holy Fridays during Lent. You don’t have to eat fish although I do. Did I tell you I that I hate fish? On Fridays, we will have Lenten dinners which will be followed by Stations of the Cross.
Lent is a season of penance, and we are supposed to do works of penance or self-punishment to atone for our sins and the sins of others. The season of Lent is not a “self-help” season. “Oh, I resolve to eat better.” You are supposed to eat well. It falls under the Fifth Commandment, so it is not a penance. You are doing your body a favor. We are supposed to do something that disciplines the will, restrains our pride, and rids ourselves of the obsession of self so that we can love better. There must be a sacrifice. For me, that would be eating fish because I hate fish! Get the theme here? I hate fish! There has to be some kind of degradation. When we sin, we tell God, “No. I’m not going to do that. No! No! No!” So, we step away from God. When we do penance, we are taking a step back toward God. Some of us may be over-achievers, like those of us who were at Fort Bragg, and have taken multiple steps away from God. Come see me. If you say, “I’m going to spend extra time in prayer.” Extra prayers take time away from our other activities. And so we begin that walk back towards God.
Now, you don’t have to say, “I’m going to give up a kidney.” The penance doesn’t have to be huge. What’s important is how much love you give it with. It’s not the size of the gift but the love with which it is given. Doing a little bit of penance with great love is very effective. What are we doing when we do penance? We are decreasing our love and fascination with ourselves, even as wonderful as I think I am, and increasing our love for God. When we love ourselves – and I especially love me – it’s hard to love others. We need to decrease self-love so that we can increase our love of God. We must love God first and then we will be able to love others. We cannot give what we do not have. Saint John the Baptist said, “He must increase, and I must decrease.” That’s exactly how we grow in the love of God. It’s awfully difficult sometimes. When I drive past a Hardee’s, I just tear up because there’s just something about the smell of bacon. Last night I had a small discomfort, but for me every discomfort is HUGE because it’s me. If you buy your lunch at work, don’t. Deprive yourself of a small meal and give that money to the poor.
This season of penance is the perfect time for us to make a good Confession. According to Church law, we are supposed to confess once a year. It’s also a good time to reach out to others who may have fallen by the wayside and bring them back to the Sacraments and to the Church to rejoin in God’s love. How do you call someone back to the Church? I’ll give you a story. This week I was doing my rounds in the Emergency Department at the VA hospital. I’m just there for the scare. When I walk by someone who is on an EKG, the machine goes crazy. Nervous? Anyway, I saw two veterans, and one of the guys was very talkative. He was coming off drugs, and he wanted to get clean. So, I talked to him for a long time. The other guy was coming off booze, but he didn’t want much to do with me. The next couple of days are not going to be pleasant at all for them. As I was talking to the nurses, I learned that the guy who was coming off the sauce has a behavioral problem. I said, “Well, he’ll get that fixed here.” The ER nurses at the VA could top any WWE steel cage match. Don’t mess with them. They don’t wear a camera; however, whatever they break the doctors can fix. So don’t worry about that.
Anyway, I was talking to the one guy, and he was upset and ashamed. One of the phrases we use in the military, not those phrases, but a good one that we use is, “We don’t shoot our wounded.” You are sick and we will take care of you until you are not. That’s exactly what we tell sinners. We don’t shoot our wounded here. The Church wants to reclaim people for Christ and keep them close to the Cross. The guy was upset so I said to him, “Here is my card. If you need someone to talk to, give me a call. A lot of counselors have not been where we’ve been.” When counselors are working with someone who has PTSD, they’ll say, “Oh, I know it must have been hard over there.” They don’t have a freaking clue because they weren’t there. But if a counselor has been there, the veterans will talk to them.
In the ten years I’ve been handing out my cards, nobody has ever called me. I’m not upset, but it’s important for me to do that. It gives people something to hang on to and to give them hope that somebody cares. We can tell people how great God has been to us and that we do not shoot our wounded although the Catholic Church tends to shoot theirs. But we will take care of you until you no longer need us. That’s what we tell people especially those who have fallen away from God because they feel guilty. Some of the guilt they feel is expressed as anger. “I don’t need this!” Then why are you so angry?
It is important for all of us to go out and search for stray and lost sheep. What are the signs of sin? Guilt, shame, fear, and remorse. The one that keeps people away is fear. Tell them that we don’t shoot our wounded. The sad part about the two veterans I met in the ER that day is that I don’t know if either of them will get clean or sober. Because they feel better for a few days, a lot of people check themselves out against medical advice and try the drugs or booze again. That’s why we must stay close and remember our frailties. As Saint Therese of Lisieux said, “When I am small, I am safe.” Instead, we think, “I’m the smartest bear in Jellystone Park. I can do this all by myself. I’m good.” However, our Lord said to be perfect. Good is not good enough.
Lent is a wonderful time for us to help ourselves to love even more. When we love more, we will be happier. Remember the apostles who had the you-know-what beat out of them in prison? They left prison and rejoiced for they were found worthy to suffer for the name. So, when we give up these small things in our lives, we should be happier. I still hate fish. . .did I tell you that? But I’m happy because I eat it for Christ and the love of others. As Saint Paul says, “Now I rejoice in my sufferings for Your sake, and in my flesh, I complete what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions for the sake of His body, that is, the church” (Colossians 1:24).
How will you apply this message to your life? _________________________________________
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